Carlos Moya

I grew up with my parents and maternal grandmother. With no brothers or sisters and virtually no other maternal or parental support, I spent a lot of time alone with my grandmother. 

Born into a family of artists, I suffered from a deep lack of affection from both. That’s why I believe that art brings relief without knowing it.

My father, Daniel Moya and my uncle Paco Medina, flamenco guitarists. My mother, María Medina and my de facto uncles, dancers, Spanish, and flamenco dance choreographers. 

My de facto grandparents, the Esteves, took my father in when he was just a boy. And their sons, Enrique (Quique) and Antonio Esteve (Antonio Gades) were like my uncles.

Under the guidance of my Uncle Quique and my mother, I started taking my first steps in dance. 

With my training as a dancer and support from Antonio and my parents, opportunities other dancers dream of came easily to me. I started my professional career with Antonio Gades’ company and the Spanish National Ballet (BNE). 

The future looked bright. The world was my oyster.

A few months after I stopped dancing, my father had a stroke. 

He was out of work and very depressed. With a lot of conflicts with his partner. With no tools to deal with the challenges. Besides, I had left home to live with my girlfriend.

After a very long year, with major family conflicts during his stay in the hospital, he died at 58. 

His illness and early death threw everything out of balance. It pulled the rug out from under my feet. The family fell apart, and I separated from my girlfriend. I was alone. All I had left was the person who had brought me up, raised me, my grandmother, who at over ninety years of age gave me all the emotional support she could for three years. And then she died, too.

Death was the force that drove me to find meaning in life. I carried on as best I could. I got by doing all kinds of jobs that had nothing to do with my career. 

Lost, in pain and full of fear, I found the theatre with my teacher, Juan Carlos Corazza, and his team. With their help and the Gestalt tools they practice, I found relief, a guide and immense wisdom.

They and the theatre opened my eyes to my humanity and to myself.

The dance I knew gave me many things of great value: a love of music, structure, perseverance, sensitivity, and a sense of aesthetics, among others. 

Despite years of learning to master the technique, I never managed it. I neither listened to nor recognised the limitations of my body. Truth be told, those years in pursuit of perfection were like chasing a carrot dangling from a stick. 

Dancing is liberating. It made me feel good. Many feelings came together, like pleasure, relief and control. I realise that now. What’s more, dancing gave me the chance to travel. It was wonderful to see so many countries and cultures with my colleagues. To work in great theatres worldwide with important people from the world of dance and the other arts at the time. A great learning experience.

Of course, there are two sides to every coin. I experienced some very unhealthy environments in dance. Situations where people were often of little importance. Contempt, disdain, hyper-demand, intolerance, and hyper-competitiveness. It was often better to stay under the radar or on the defence if you wanted to avoid getting hurt.

Your life becomes your artistic life. And this a quest for perfection and control that can cause a lot of harm, frustration, and suffering. 

Years later, the theatre confronted me with a vision with a look that sees perfection as an enemy of beauty.

And a dancer’s career is such a short one! So what then?

Some colleagues were recycled internally in the Ministry of Culture to start another life from scratch, totally outside the profession. Few continued with dance. I decided to depart earlier when I still had some time to redesign my life.

It was a difficult decision because I am passionate about dance, and I took it at a very bad time.

Since then, I have travelled a long and very necessary professional and personal road. This stage ended when I graduated in Drama from the Estudio Corazza and the Madrid School of Gestalt Therapy (EMTG), where I did a postgraduate degree in Group Process Analysis.  

I am still training in Integrative Psychotherapy in the Seekers After Truth (SAT) programme with my teachers’ teacher, Claudio Naranjo.

Training as an actor, I discovered my vocation by chance. My passions were revealed to me in an integrative and meaningful way: to investigate and teach how to integrate and transmit what I have learned throughout this time. Dance, the theatre and Gestalt became complementary knowledge to help others.

Three strengths to help people to give the best of themselves to themselves and to others, in a more conscious, fuller, healthier way. More human.

That you can shine by looking at yourself more lovingly. As far as I am concerned, there’s no more exciting glow.

Connecting soul and movement with technique is overwhelming. It happens and disarms you.

Whether or not you are an artist or not, because this is about people, I feel fortunate to share my knowledge of the arts and the personal development tools I have learned.

Happy that you find them useful to help you find your difference and, above all, your well-being and coherence.